5 days off!!!! I am thinking to go somewhere else, to achieve that transcendental state, to know thyself well…says who? Naaah. I’m here, cuddling my own blanket and pillow baby. Sleeping more than my sister does, yeah I sleep 12-16 hours a day. Procrastinating and doing nothing than stalking my idols on instagram, waiting for the new posts of Angel Locsin and hating every post of Jessy. What’s wrong with me, being unproductive is making me a social media addict, more addict than before. Taking a meal once a day, bed rest with bathroom privileges. If I could just use a diaper while lying on my bed, I would do that, cus peeing is an interruption to happiness and distracting my sweetdreams. Lol. Good side of it, man I lose 1 kg, I’m back to 40s baby. haha. But yeah gotta read something inspirational, I promise I will feast upon the scriptures starting today. Promise!!! Gotta feed the good wolf inside me!
High school and college got me into fighting time mode like I’m trying to save the world, like the powerpuffs, fighting for what I know is right when I see someone’s wrong. Some did misinterpret me because I admit when I fight back, it was kinda rude. Most people hated me while some true friends stayed. But now just thinking about it, I find it so sissy. Now that I’m on my late 20s, when somebody annoys me, in my mind, I’m breaking her bones, pulling the hair while I walk to make her realize her mistakes- but it stays there, on my mind. haha. I am too lazy bringing up the bull out of me and I feel like I’m ’bout to shine bright like diamond in the sky, busy ripening to perfection, so let those twisted thoughts be dumped into my attic cat.
During my teen years, I exercise regularly. I had my routine. I wake up at 3am studying for exam, 5am go to Marcos Stadium jogging for 30 minutes then prepare to school at 6am. Now that I am working and earning on my own, I enrolled myself to the gym and ended up gaining more weight so I was discouraged after that. So now this is me, having the desire to exercise but ended up being lazy. After work, I am even lazy to take a bath, lazy to move a finger to turn off the light. Even lazier to reach my tumbler to have some water to drink. I’m too lazy I gotta marry, I could hardly do it on my own. If my bf says he will treat me like a queen, then he gotta make it real cus I’ll be the laziest girl he ever have!
Getting old, is getting fat. Yup! Gone are the days where you can eat a lot and stay thin. Say hello to big arms that are not proportion to your body and for that fluffy tummy they accentuate your fat cheeks! Hello also to those lousy clothes, say goodbye to fitted jeans and blouses, it’s been quite a journey, they will be missed.
Rooting for this day.. So I could totally eradicate my fear of getting fat. haha
Care about blood work up? I do. Being a nurse at late twenties, makes me more be aware of my body. I do get checked about my labs cus who knows what’s wrong with my blood. Signs come first before symptoms. I don’t have to feel it first before checking. Better be sure than regret at the end. All of the people of my age should do the same thing, no matter what profession you are into. Stress aberrates the hormones.
Real talk. Even if you are super-ultra-mega tired, you still have to be that fairy god mother waving your wand to make your patients feel better. You have to because that’s your job. You are on your own now, you have to work or else you’ve got no food on your plate, no money for your dependents, no house to live, no money on your bank account. You’re a big girl now. And big girls don’t cry no matter the situation is, remember that! You are here to work! And who says that money doesn’t make the world go round? It does my dear. You gotta work to stay alive and money will keep you alive. Again this is real talk, not your fairy tale, Utopia kind of talk.
Yeah til now, I’m not used to it. Especially if the one calling you Ma’am is way older than you.. I know it’s just them being courteous and try to sell stuffs but still it’s kinda awkward. Because of them calling you Ma’am repeatedly, you tryna portray a more matured Madam kind of thing, and it just doesn’t suit you because you have a baby face and it makes you look more awkward. Just because you have a credit card, they are calling you Ma’am. Try looking like a beggar and you won’t hear a thing. The inequality of man. Never a communism will exist in this world, only in heaven.
This is a true story.
When I was a girl I used to pretend looking like a lady. Going to school wearing my red high heels, I could even run to my next class with my heels on, now I’m amazed just thinking about it. But now that I’m an adult I prefer comfortable slip in cloth sandals. I’ve got lots of shoes like most women do, but I use the same sandals. Except during church of course. When I am forced to use my heels just because I have a tall boyfriend, I am always complaining while walking even if the destination is just nearby. Who says high heels give you a good feel? It actually sucks.
Getting old and still doesn’t know how to use make up, oh that’s classic. I remember when I had my date and my colleague put on mascara on my brows and I ended up scratching my eyes during the date, wow that’s classic. Since then, I vowed not to use liners nor mascara. No powder since the workplace is air- conditioned, no contouring since I really dunno how. I’ll just smile as needed, and take advantage of being Asian. (They said Asians look younger than their age)
Getting old is getting classic. Before I try to impress people that I should look cool in their eyes. Now I am more on trying to impress my God so that I look cool in His eyes. Been working on it since primary years, but this time I am more serious. Trying to figure out myself is drawing me closer to Him. I still commit mistakes, but I’m trying to get better, to be in sync with God. It’s a long and a lifetime process but I am willing to get into that journey of knowing Him more. Avoiding to be hypocrite and judgmental to other people is my goal, because I know my God is a God of justice and mercy. Everyday, I am a witness of God’s grace, truly my family is in God’s grace and I am grateful for that.
Tho sometimes I’m scared, so scared. I still put my trust on Him no matter how slippery the slide is.
Getting old, getting classic, is getting to know more about God’s goodness.
God is good. He’s in everybody’s business. 👆👆👆👆👆🙌👏
#gettingold #gettingclassic #gettingclosetoHim